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Mr President,
August 1, 2006    File under:

Like most Americans, I take gas prices as evidence that the earth hates us and that it must be driven into the ground at all costs. At present, however, I am not sure how long I will be able to continue as a direct participant in the subjugation of the oil-stingy planet. I'm glad the administration is supporting alternative fuel research and was pleased to see the footage of you at the hydrogen fueling station prototype in the film Who Killed The Electric Car?. I was concerned, however, when those scientist guys, who seemed pretty smart, said how the hydrogen car wasn't going to work. Heck, even that guy who worked for Toyota said it might not work, at least not for a while, and I think we need something now to help us continue our assault. Then, thinking back to you at that hydrogen fuel pump, I had an idea, thinking about how when you were talking to the pump tech you seemed to just make up the words, how spontaneous you seemed when you talked about our bright future. Heck, you just made the future up. So I was thinking if we could harness that spontaneity and optimism into a gas-spontaneity hybrid, maybe we could keep on going. I've been told, and I've seen evidence in my own life, that in moments of caprice one worries less about money and consequence, and I'm thinking that such an enthusiasm could keep me from sweating it at the pump. Hell, maybe I'd even feel like disconnecting my muffler and catalytic converter, just to speed things up. I don't know what you think about this, but you seem to be able to declare things pretty well, so I say I believe in you, let's give this thing a shot.

Yours,

Jake Adam York

Posted by Jake Adam York at August 1, 2006 12:30 PM